Feb 02, 2020 08:00am
Moving Beyond Shame and Regret: Part One

Rick Warren recently wrote a great article about how Our Churches Should Be No Shame Zones. I’ve been surprised at the pushback online. Many people have taken issue with the title alone, without even reading the article, because of an ingrained belief that shame is God’s chosen motivator to make us repent and turn to him.

But the Bible is clear. In Romans 2:4 the Apostle Paul wrote, “God’s kindness is intended to lead you to repentance.”

Yes, repentance certainly involves remorse and contrition. But shame as we know it is an obstacle. It stops our progress. It locks people up in patterns of self-loathing and self-destructiveness. Shame often keeps us from God. Thankfully, God gives us his Word to guide us through the process of moving beyond shame and regret in a holy, healthy way.

King David is notably recognized for two stories: the defeat of Goliath and his sin with Bathsheba. What a conflicting legacy, right? However, both stories really illustrate the grace of God at work in his life. David defeated the giant by the miraculous power and grace of God. And one year after David committed adultery with Bathsheba: he conspired to have her husband killed, covered it all up, and was confronted by the prophet Nathan who led him to repentance.

David wrote several psalms about his experience of God’s undeserved forgiveness and kindness. One of those is Psalm 32, which gives us a great roadmap for moving beyond our own shame and regret.

This is the first of a seven-part journey through Psalm 32. The first step: Recognize the goodness of God.

Your view of God will determine whether you move toward him or away from him when you experience guilt and shame. If you believe that God is mad at you, doesn’t like you, and is bent on your destruction, you’ll run from him. But if you believe what David believed, you’ll run into his arms.

“Blessed is the one whose transgressions are forgiven, whose sins are covered. Blessed is the one whose sin the Lord does not count against them and in whose spirit is no deceit.” ~ Psalm 32:1-2 

Have you felt the weight of the curse of sin? I believe we all have at one time or another. The bigger question is this: Do you believe that there is blessing in the experience of forgiveness?

When you experience shame over sin, you need to believe that God loves you, wants to forgive you, and wants to healingly restore your soul.

And if you experience shame that was spoken into you by the words or actions of others, by no choice of your own, you need to know that God understands. He cares. He looks out for your best interests.

When you’ve sinned, God is good. And when you confess, he is faithful to bless you with forgiveness. If you’re willing to take him at his word and believe in his goodness, simply bring your shame to God and he’ll bless you for doing so.

Copyright © 2020 by Brandon Cox @ Used with permission. No part of this article may be reproduced or reprinted without permission in writing from