The meeting was set. It was time to get it all out in the open. No more she said this and she said that. While I wasn’t looking forward to it necessarily, I wanted to get to the root of the issue and clear the air.
But almost immediately, accusations were hurled at me. This was not a civil or anywhere close to a professional conversation, as I was led to believe it would be.
I felt under attack.
Believe me, I wanted to retaliate. I wanted to have my say. I wanted my voice to be heard, too. There had been a complete misunderstanding. What was being said was not true.
There were mediators present who were supposed to keep things from getting out of control, but they sat silent. They let the attack continue as the finger was pointed in my face. Finally, it was my turn to say something. I tried to calm myself before speaking. Emotions were high and I could feel my voice quiver as i began to speak. My hands shook as I tried to keep them out of view. I had never in my life been talked to in such a way in a professional environment.
As I tried to share my account, I was constantly interrupted and more hurtful claims thrown at me. But every time I would try to stand up for myself, I was silenced. The screaming voice of my accuser was allowed to continue while I was cut off and not allowed to speak.
The meeting ended with nothing being resolved. It had gotten out of control and the mediators knew it was an even messier situation than before. It was evident there was no desire to find a solution.
What hurt the most was these were people I considered to be friends. When I had been approached about the situation, I had no clue who could be accusing me. When we met, I was shocked to find out it was someone I held dear.
“And straightway in the morning the chief priests held a consultation with the elders and scribes and the whole council, and bound Jesus, and carried him away, and delivered him to Pilate. And Pilate asked him, Art thou the King of the Jews? And he answering said unto him, Thou sayest it. And the chief priests accused him of many things: but he answered nothing. And Pilate asked him again, saying, Answerest thou nothing? behold how many things they witness against thee. But Jesus yet answered nothing; so that Pilate marvelled.” (Mark 15:1-5)
Jesus had been arrested, spit on, mocked, beaten and taken before the Jewish council. Now, He was bound and taken to Pilate, the Roman governor. The religious Jews could not condemn Jesus to death, that was only something the Roman government could do. So in order for them to get their way and have Jesus executed, Pilate had to make the decision.
These people hurled false accusations at Jesus. Everything they told Pilate was a far cry from the truth. Yet Jesus remained silent.
I know that feeling. But staying quiet during that feels so impossible. Especially because they wanted Him dead. It would be easy to hate these men who were accusing Him. But that’s the thing…Jesus loved them. Not their words, not their lies, not their deceit, but the men. These were people whom He had taught, people He knew, people that had been entrusted to do the will of God, and yet they wanted Him dead.
Nothing Jesus could say in that moment would have changed their hearts. They had their minds made up. There was no resolve to this situation. And Jesus remained silent. Even Pilate marveled at Him, or admired Him with wonder.
So what can we take from this? How can we learn from Jesus’ example?
Hold our tongue and trust in God’s plan.
Easy to say, but hard to do, I know. As much as we want our side of the story to be told, the bottom line is, the truth will eventually come out. And God will use the situation to bring about something even greater. We simply have to trust Him. I’ll pray for the situations you are going through. As your accuser stands with their finger in your face and your anger surges to the top, remember Jesus’ example. Trust in Him to work it out.