May 10, 2021 18:00pm
Gentleness: Listening, Speaking, and Getting Angry

There are three segments to our Legacy Lesson:

1. Icebreaker

2. Legacy Lesson–Bible point: Listening, Speaking, and Getting Angry

3. Wrap-up: Apply the message to our own lives; work on memory verse

I. Icebreaker:

This month we are talking about GENTLENESS. Like kindness, gentleness is a fruit of the Holy Spirit, proof that the Holy Spirit is transforming us to look more like Jesus. Gentleness is “acting in a manner that is gentle and mild and even-tempered”. Gentleness is talking and acting in a way that shows respect for God and respect for others.

One of the ways we will learn about being gentle today is through our listening, speaking, and reacting.

Discussion Questions to get your people thinking about today’s topic:

●How good a listener are you?

Rate yourself on a scale from 1 -10; 10 being the best listener ever!

●Would you describe yourself more of a listener or a talker?

Name someone who is a great listener.

Name someone who seems to talk all the time.

●Are you quick tempered? Who do you know gets angry a lot? What makes them mad?

2. Transition over to Legacy Lesson:

You will need a Bible to read our focus story. Feel free to modify for your sphere of influence.

Add, revise, or delete sections that would help keep attention for 30 minutes or less. (For younger audiences, I would aim for 10-15 minutes!)

We are going to look at ways of becoming more GENTLE this month. James gives us some really good advice on how we can do this. Before we read his advice, let’s learn a few things about him.

James sounds a lot like Peter, doesn’t he? Sometimes, it’s those of us who have made grave

mistakes that are the most thankful and live the most passionate lives.

Read James 1:19

Suggestion: Write this out for your people to see…have someone read it. As they read it, underline the 3 parts of the verse that are underlined. Those 3 parts are the areas we will learn more about in this lesson.

Let’s talk about the first part: QUICK TO LISTEN

The first part of this verse focuses on ONE way to be gentle with others: Be quick to listen. We’re going to spend a few minutes on this idea!

⭐ Discussion Question: What keeps us from being good listeners?

I feel our biggest obstacle to being quick to listen is this: DISTRACTIONS.

There were also distractions in ancient times; let’s see this come alive in a Bible story that illustrates this point perfectly.

Go to Luke 10: 38-42.

(If you can have a person in your family read it, GO FOR IT! This is a great way to come together as a family—reading God’s Word! If they are too young, I’ve supplied it down below.)

As Jesus and his disciples were on their way, he came to a village where a woman named Martha opened her home to him. She had a sister called Mary, who sat at the Lord’s feet listening to what he said. But Martha was distracted by all the preparations that had to be made. She came to him and asked, “Lord, don’t you care that my sister has left me to do the work by myself? Tell her to help me!”

“Martha, Martha,” the Lord answered, “you are worried and upset about many things, but few things are needed—or indeed only one. Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her.”

Discussion Questions:

Who was quick to listen? MARY

Where was she? Sitting at the feet of Jesus, LISTENING to his teaching

Who was very distracted? MARTHA

Why was she distracted? She was preparing her house and a meal for Jesus and the disciples. She felt like she was doing all the work because her sister wasn’t helping her.

Can you relate to Martha being distracted? (Ummmm, my life.)

Have you ever been distracted at church? (YES. My kids would agree. Adult church can be tough for young ones.)

Who was a good listener? Mary…because of this, she got to learn from Jesus himself! Sadly, Martha missed out on a beautiful opportunity because she was very distracted from getting ready for the meal. (Something every mama can understand, I’m sure!)

Point about distractions:

Though we may have legitimate things going on around us, we can get really distracted

from listening to others (like our kiddos). These little distractions can cause us to potentially miss out on moments of learning or bonding.

Discussion time: Let me ask you some questions on this idea of being quick to listen.

Point: Giving your 100% attention is one of the best ways to show GENTLENESS

Discussion Questions on SPEAKING:

Discussion Questions on ANGER:

3. Wrapping-Up: Applying it to our lives

This week’s memory verse is pretty simple—James 1:19!! This week, we are going to hold each other accountable with these 3 things:

  • Be quick to listen.
  • Be slow to speak.
  • Be slow to get angry.

Use those family strategies about dealing with anger! Post them somewhere and encourage your people to use them when they start getting frustrated! This could be a very powerful way to help them deal with anger appropriately!

Copyright © 2021 by Amber Spencer @lionesslegacymama. No part of this article may be reproduced or reprinted without permission in writing from