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Nov 21, 2024 18:00pm

What Now?: Criticism

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The following comes from the devotional book “What Now?” by Ashley Akers. To learn more, go to www.whatnowdevo.com.

Criticism

Have you ever heard the phrase: “the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree”? This phrase proved true with me in being critical of others. My father was a very critical man and if something wasn’t done right, yelling would quickly follow. In a home video from my childhood I was mowing a patch of grass to prepare for our new garden. Apparently, I wasn’t doing it correctly because the video shows my father having the worst temper tantrum.

This type of criticism from my dad continued all throughout my childhood and I took the baton from him when I became an adult. I unintentionally continued this critical spirit. It’s what I knew. I found myself criticizing actions of people because I felt like I could do them better. My criticism wasn’t helping, it was making things worse. It tore people down and before I knew it, they didn’t try any more or pushed me away.

Galatians 5:14-15 says,

For the whole law is fulfilled in one word: “You shall love your neighbor as yourself.” But if you bite and devour one another, watch out that you are not consumed by one another.

Love trumps criticism. Period.

It is easy to see the faults of others and difficult to love them through it. All of us can quickly turn to gossip and the good that we used to see in that person vanishes. When you start to become critical of a person, love them by looking at how much you love yourself. If you can dig deep and look at how you would want to be treated when you need help, it would be easier to show that same respect and love to another person. Put yourself in their place and think about it before you speak words that could deflate their spirit.

Living a life without love is like a pack of wild animals, biting and devouring each other. It will always end with one or both getting hurt. Why do animals in the wild fight like this? Because it’s their nature. They each want something to benefit themselves and will consume each other to get it. It can be brutal! This is how having a critical spirit can be. When we criticize we essentially are devouring another person, for our own personal gain. We tend to not count the cost of relationships and are blinded by the battle within ourselves.

I have learned when my eyes are focused completely on God, I’m not as critical of others. Things don’t bother me as much, but when they do, I pray about it. Things don’t have to be done my way. I had to accept that people do things differently. And while their actions may or may not be wrong, I must learn the proper way to handle them: not with criticism but with love. Taking that step back and getting’s God perspective on the situation at hand is difficult sometimes, but it has proven to be beneficial for all. I’m a work in progress, but by God’s grace He is helping me defeat the cycle of criticism, step by step.

Reflection Questions

1. Who have you criticized?

2. How has criticism that you have received affected you?

3. What steps will you try to take before being critical of somebody?