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May 24, 2025 06:00am

Vengeance is the Lord’s, but Mercy is Our’s

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“Vengeance is mine, says the Lord!”

Maybe you’ve heard that before. But what does it mean?

When someone wrongs you, it’s easy to want vengeance. There is a very human instinct to seek retribution for harm done to your reputation, your ego, your financial holdings, and on down the line. That instinct says, “Something was taken from me, and now I should get to take it from you.”

This might be something you experienced as a child. Your sibling hit you, so you hit them back. A kid at the playground snatched your toy, so you snatched it back. You got called a name, so you shouted out an insult in return. Going into high school, someone spread a nasty rumor about you, so you chose to smear their name in return. This thirst for revenge is common among all people, and it often gets confused for justice.

As we get older, we (usually) learn to rein in that desire. We understand that we can’t just retaliate in kind when someone hurts us. Someone cuts us off in traffic, but to do the same in return would be dangerous and potentially cause an accident. Someone breaks into our car, but we don’t go track down their car and break in to get even. Our spouse cheats on us, but we don’t cheat on them in return.

Culturally, we recognize that an appropriate response to wrongdoing is to report it to the proper authorities. When we retaliate in kind, we often end up in the same kind of trouble as the initial instigator did. The police would not accept “He did it first” as an excuse for breaking into anyone’s car, whether it was true or not. And that is where we get the distinction between justice and vengeance. Justice is when retaliation is carried out properly, and vengeance is when it is taken into our own hands.

And what do we do when the perceived insult is not a legal matter? When a coworker slanders our work ethic, or a fellow parent in the PTA starts spreading vicious gossip, or a teacher gives our kid a grade we believe is unfair? How do we handle it then? We can’t take that to the police. Maybe in some cases there is some higher authority to report the offense to, but really, it might not make much of a difference. Especially if the person in higher authority happens to be the offender.

That’s when, as Christians, we must accept that vengeance is not ours to take. We have an outlet that unbelievers do not: recognizing that it is God who will deal out judgment on the perceived injustices we experience. It’s not up to us to do it. God sees, and He knows the proper response. Growing up in church, I heard this taught early in my life, and I took it to heart, but without the maturity to understand the depth of it. Because on its own, Romans 12:19 (NRSVUE) sounds very satisfying: “Beloved, never avenge yourselves, but leave room for the wrath of God, for it is written, ‘Vengeance is mine; I will repay, says the Lord.’”

God’s wrath? Wow! It can give us a distinctly un-Christian thrill of satisfaction to imagine God pouring out His wrath on the people who offended us. That rude, reckless driver in traffic? God gave them a flat tire to repay their behavior! That gossiping mom from the PTA? Her baby spit up all in her new hairdo! The gossiping coworker? They got written up for texting instead of working! The cheating spouse? Imagine the horrific punishments a spurned husband or wife could imagine God delivering! Man, God is good to avenge us like that, right?

I definitely took it that way when I was a young, immature believer. My brother had been irritating me to no end one day, absolutely getting on my last nerve. I was so tempted to fight back…but then, I remembered a pastor’s recent sermon. Vengeance is mine, says the Lord. And so, I prayed. “God, get my brother back for how he’s been treating me!” And I moved on with satisfaction that he’d get his comeuppance. But later that evening, I was stricken with fear over what God might do to him. He was my brother! I didn’t want anything bad to happen to him! So I quickly prayed and asked God not to get revenge on my brother, and asked Him to forgive my brother instead.

And I think that’s where the core of this passage lies, because Romans 12:19 doesn’t exist in a vacuum. Check out the verses surrounding it.

“Do not repay anyone evil for evil, but take thought for what is noble in the sight of all. If it is possible, so far as it depends on you, live peaceably with all. Beloved, never avenge yourselves, but leave room for the wrath of God, for it is written, ‘Vengeance is mine; I will repay, says the Lord.” Instead, ‘if your enemies are hungry, feed them; if they are thirsty, give them something to drink, for by doing this you will heap burning coals over their heads.’ Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.” – Romans 12:17-21 (NRSVUE)

I don’t think the point of this is for us to learn that we should sit on the edge of our seats, waiting for God to dole out punishment on our behalf. I think the point is to change our hearts toward our offenders. In essence, God is leading Paul to tell his readers, “Someone wronged you? Leave it in God’s hands. Your job is to live peacefully with them, be merciful to them, and show them love instead of retaliation.”

Martin Luther King, Jr. captured this essence when he said, “Hate begets hate; violence begets violence; toughness begets a greater toughness. We must meet the forces of hate with the power of love…”

It is true that vengeance is the Lord’s. There will come a day when He will enact justice upon every unforgiven evil act in the world. That will be a great and terrifying day. However, He shows infinite restraint in waiting for that time so that sinners may come to repentance. And He expects us to do the same. Let God be in charge of the vengeance, and we’ll be His hands and feet by doling out mercy.

Instead of visualizing the various ways God might avenge you on your offender, instead let such a thought spur you to love. Realize that you don’t want them to face God’s unshielded wrath—no one should want that—and instead seek opportunities to repay their harm with kindness. Pray for their forgiveness. Treat them with love. Let the knowledge that vengeance is out of your hands spur you to, as Paul said, “heap burning coals over their head.” This means that as they see our kindness, they will be ashamed of their wrongdoing and repent.

This worked for me once, in grade school. The way I went about it might not have been the best, but as you might be able to tell by my previous examples, I was a bit overzealous at that age. There was a kid at school who had been picking on me, and it was getting me down. My mom encouraged me to show him kindness and “heap burning coals” on his head. So the next day, I went to school, and when he said something unkind to me, I responded: “I don’t care what you say to me, because I’m going to be nice to you anyway, and doing that will heap burning coals on your head!”

The kid was stunned, but we ended up being good friends after that.

In the end, I think the lesson God (through Paul) wanted us to learn from this passage is that our spirit shouldn’t be one that seeks vengeance. It should be one of forgiveness, kindness, and (if possible) reconciliation. James 2:13 (NRSVUE) tells us, “For judgment will be without mercy to anyone who has shown no mercy; mercy triumphs over judgment.”

Mercy triumphs over judgment.

That’s a comforting thought.

But it is dependent on us being willing to show mercy as it was shown to us. Christians have been granted the greatest mercy in the world. How could we do any less for those who do wrong to us?

Vengeance is the Lord’s. Know that, take comfort in it, but let it drive you to merciful kindness.