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Nov 01, 2025 06:00am

Musings of a Lawn Chair Mom

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When my three kids were all younger, I aspired to be a lawn-chair mom.
It was a tender dream of mine.
You might be thinking, “What in the world is a lawn-chair mom?” Well, let me paint the picture for you.
Mom takes the kids to the pool. Mom puts flotation devices on her kids. Kids jump into the pool and have fun for hours. Mom sits in a lawn chair, watching blissfully from the sidelines, perhaps even mustering up a good tan (or more freckles, if you’re like me). And on a good day, she may have a book or reading material in her hand.
Ahhh, isn’t it picturesque? I can just hear Dr. Seuss’s words in my head: Oh, the pools I would go to…

But for years, my pool days were much different. Picture Mama wading through the shallow end with two boys—one on each hip—while maintaining eye contact on her older girl (also in the shallow end) playing with friends. Mama would strike a fine balance of patiently teaching boys how to swim as they chucked the pool toys in the water for her to fetch. Boys would then take turns jumping into the water to Mama (giving her the ultimate HIIT workout). By the time pool time was done, Mama was worn out. On her way out, she would walk past “lawn-chair mamas” and say to them, “I want to be you one day!” (Imagine me saying this while toting two boys and hauling every conceivable pool toy, beach towel, and snack one could want while at the pool for, say, an hour.)

Oh, how I yearned for those independent days of being a lawn-chair mom, especially when this season of life felt hard and exhausting.

The Bible says in Ecclesiastes 3, “There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens . . . a time to weep and a time to laugh . . . a time to embrace and a time to refrain from embracing . . . a time to be silent and a time to speak” (verses 1–8).

As mamas, we know these seasons well. There are times we want to cry because of our kids’ behavior . . . or because of our lack of parenting skills—or both. And yet, we keep fighting the good battle (lest our kids smell defeat wafting in the air, like a mean dish of Mama’s Hamburger Helper). We continue to teach, discipline, reward, encourage, and train because we know there is a blessing in not giving up.

There are times we mamas just have to take a step back and laugh instead of losing our cool and becoming “one of those parents.” (Like that time you discovered pee under the kitchen table—and you know it didn’t come from your dog.) Surely, this is what King Solomon envisioned when he wrote about the Proverbs 31 woman, who is clothed with strength and dignity and laughs at the future (verse 25).

There are times we have to put our arms around our kiddos and tell them that we love them so much, but we have to discipline them for their behavior. We establish boundaries to protect them, not to limit them.

There are times when we must be firm in correcting a wrong and refrain from embracing it. (Like those times a naughty word has been said or a sibling has been whacked by another sibling.)

And there are times when we mamas must sometimes be silent before responding to our kids’ actions. Perhaps the action was shocking or disrespectful. Perhaps it was disappointing. Surely, being silent and taking time to sit before the Lord to process one’s reaction to such behavior earns a mama many crowns in heaven, doesn’t it?

No matter what season you’re in, mama, I suggest one thing: pray.
Pray that you would build up your kids, not tear them down.
Pray that you would have wisdom on discipline, and God would give you the right words at the right moment.
Pray that you keep your cool in a not-so-cool moment.
Pray that your kids will have a guilty conscience so that they will confess their sin before you discover it. (I am still waiting on the confession of the kiddo who peed under my kitchen table.)
Pray that your kids will be caught in their sin, and that God will use that to create a repentant heart.
Pray for their hearts to be tender to God—His love and redemption—in such a way that they choose to turn to Him as Savior from their sins and Lord of their lives.
Just pray, dear mama. And let them catch you praying for them. Better yet, let them catch you praying for yourself, too. Our kids need to see that mama needs Jesus, too.

Don’t wish for future seasons and miss all the beauty in this one—hard seasons often reap the best fruit in life. Because, as you know, time is fleeting and one day, those babies will be walking out of your house and starting their own lives by themselves. And it might just break your heart.

Years later, I can tell you that I have thoroughly enjoyed my lawn-chair mama days. But I can also tell you I miss those days when my kids needed me to be hands-on for everything. While they don’t technically need me to bandage their wounds, tie their shoes, or make their lunches, one thing hasn’t changed: they still need me. It just looks different these days. They need my love and support when friends are mean to them. They need my boundaries and discipline to help them live wisely. They need my encouragement when life is hard. But most of all, they need my prayers to mold and shape their hearts. Prayer is powerful prophecy, dear mama. If my prayers today can help change their lives tomorrow, I am here for it!

Parenting is the most important job we will ever have—hands down. But believe me when I tell you this: it will go in the blink of an eye.

Until then, enjoy the wild ride of motherhood. I’m praying that God helps you raise water-walking, Bible-believing, Gospel-grounded children who grow up to be men and women after God’s own heart.
And on your hardest days, don’t forget this: there’s a lawn chair waiting for you in your future.