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“What do you want?” I asked my friend.
“I want him to love me. I want him to only want me and no one else. I want him to want to adore me.” she said with tears in her eyes.
“Then it’s not him who you want. He will never be or do those things. He will never choose that.”
The reality was harsh. Time and time again, I had talked her through another tearfest brought on by this dumb guy. He knew exactly what he was doing and he didn’t care. Why should he? He could run around with whomever he wanted and he thought she would always be there. Always ready to open her arms wide and offer the greatest love he could imagine.
“Let him go.” I urged her. “He will never choose you first.”
And it was true.
He knew it. She knew it. Every girl in town knew it.
It was time.
John 12:37-41
“But though he had done so many miracles before them, yet they believed not on him:
38 That the saying of Esaias the prophet might be fulfilled, which he spake, Lord, who hath believed our report? and to whom hath the arm of the Lord been revealed?
39 Therefore they could not believe, because that Esaias said again,
40 He hath blinded their eyes, and hardened their heart; that they should not see with their eyes, nor understand with their heart, and be converted, and I should heal them.
41 These things said Esaias, when he saw his glory, and spake of him.”
Time after time, the Lord had given the Jewish people opportunity. He offered His only Son to them. He offered His unconditional love to them. He offered them life. But, they would not turn to Him. Isaiah had prophesied that men would see miracles and still not believe in God.
When you first read this passage it might sound like God prevented them from believing in Him. That He made the first move and hardened their hearts and blinded their eyes to where they couldn’t see what or who Jesus was. But let’s look closer.
God is all-knowing. He knows what decisions we will make before we ever do. This passage shows that God was merely confirming their choice. They would never turn to Him. They would never choose Him.
That’s a harsh reality.
Does that mean we give up sharing Jesus with them? No. We let God be God and we continue doing as He commanded to Go and make disciples. If people refuse to believe, we can pray for the Lord to soften their hearts, open their eyes and minds to receive the calling from the Holy Spirit.
It doesn’t mean we didn’t try enough, do enough or pray enough. Their choice is between them and God.
But I’ll still keep praying.
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