Blog

Nov 07, 2026 06:00am

Beyond Forgiveness: Loving Those Who Hurt You.

59 Views

Almost all of us will have enemies in this life. Those who lead will pick them up like mosquitoes in the summer; the Enemy will see to that.

OUR STRATEGY

If we are faithful followers of Christ, we are called to deal with everyone—friend and foe—the way our King desires.

And the model is Him.

He told us, and then He showed us as He walked on earth, so there would be no confusion. We are to cooperate so fully with Him and depend so completely upon His empowering Spirit that we respond just as Christ did (and does) toward His enemies.

FORGIVE

First and foremost, we are to forgive.

We see this in the opening book of the Bible with the majestic story of Joseph and his forgiveness of the brothers who had betrayed him. He saw beyond their malicious jealousy to the sovereignty of God.

“You meant it for evil,” he said to them near the close of his life, “but God meant it for good to bring about this present result and preserve many people alive” (Genesis 50:20).

He knew God had a great agenda and that He could even use enemies to accomplish His plans.

And we see this truth all the way through the Bible to the cross. Even as Jesus was being crucified, forgiveness flowed from His heart toward those who were putting Him to death.

Forgiveness is releasing the debt you feel others owe you. You no longer feel the need to make them pay.

It is forgiving those who have hurt you, or whom you perceive have hurt you. But it is more: it is transferring the issue from your courtroom to God’s.

It is letting God be God as the Ultimate Arbiter of all injustice—real or perceived—in our relationships.

AND …

But we must not stop there if we are to manifest the fullness of Christ to a needy, watching world.

We must go beyond mere forgiveness to loving and blessing those who have hurt us.

This was Jesus’ clear command as He explained how His kingdom operates in Matthew 5.

“You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall love your neighbor and hate your enemy.’ But I say to you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, so that you may be sons of your Father who is in heaven; for He causes His sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous. For if you love those who love you, what reward do you have? Do not even the tax collectors do the same?” (Matthew 5:43–46)

God further expounds on this truth in Proverbs 25 and Romans 12.

“If your enemy is hungry, give him food to eat; And if he is thirsty, give him water to drink; For you will heap burning coals on his head, And the Lord will reward you.” (Proverbs 25:21–22)

This passage can be difficult to understand in our culture.

One explanation of the imagery comes from the ancient practice of carrying burning coals in a container, sometimes on one’s head, to bring fire back to the home. In this interpretation, providing coals was an act of kindness rather than judgment.

While the precise meaning of the imagery is debated, the command is clear: we are to respond to our enemies with practical acts of kindness.

When I encourage people to go beyond forgiveness to love and bless those who have hurt them, they often “explain to me” that they can’t.

In light of what their enemy has done, love seems impossible.

I remind them that it is certainly impossible through mere human affection, which can easily be lost like a leaf on the wind.

But not Divine love.

God IS love, and His is a love that “never fails.”

If you are a true believer, God’s Spirit resides in you, which means His love is in you. You can ask Him to pour His love into your heart through the Holy Spirit (Romans 5:5). And the fruit the Spirit will display is Divine, enduring love.

Loving the unlovable is one of the greatest evidences of the reality of Christianity and one of the most powerful ways to glorify and manifest Him.

What greater gift could we give to our King than to be the vehicle through which His love reaches a needy, unbelieving world?