Blog

May 10, 2025 06:00am

Grave Tending

338 Views

We were up by one point with just a few seconds left in the basketball game when Coach called a timeout. During that huddle, he looked me in the eyes and said, “Gillmore, do not foul. Whatever you do, do not foul.”

As the timeout ended, we ran back onto the floor to play defense against our opponent. A girl from the other team threw up a last-second shot, and out of reflex, I went up for the rebound. The moment I heard the whistle, my heart sank. I didn’t even have to look at the ref—I already knew what he was signaling. Three fingers on one hand, five on the other.

Foul on #35 for Cord-Charlotte.

The other team shot two free throws. Both went in. We were now down by one. After the free throws, we had just enough time to inbound the ball and rush down the court, but it was too late. We lost. Because of me. Because I fouled at a crucial moment.

As soon as we shook hands and walked off the court into the locker room, I hung my head. The tears started falling, and they didn’t stop. I sat beside my mom and dad in the bleachers and cried like a baby.

The next two days were miserable. I couldn’t sleep. The guilt was overwhelming. In practice, I couldn’t make a shot to save my life. I fumbled every pass, missed every dribble. The mistake I had made was strangling me, stunting my game, killing my motivation. I couldn’t move past it.

Coach watched me struggle for a while, then finally pulled me aside. He looked me square in the eyes and said, “What in the world is wrong with you? Get it together.”

I hung my head again, tears welling up. “Coach, it’s all my fault. I’m the reason we lost. It’s all on me. I let the team down.”

Coach grabbed me by the shoulders, made me lift my head, and said, “We all make mistakes. That loss wasn’t on one person. It was a combination of mistakes made by an entire team. What matters is how we recover and learn from them. Stop looking backward and start looking at the next goal. We’ve got a new game to win. We’ve got a season to win, a tournament to win, a trophy to win. One moment will not define our season.”

That was the pep talk I needed. A moment that I had naively thought would define my future was just a blip on the radar of my life. And yet, it had the potential to profoundly trip me up. The truth is, we all face moments where our past threatens to hold us back. But God calls us to keep moving forward.

As Paul wrote in Philippians:

“This one thing I do: forgetting those things which are behind and reaching forth unto those things which are before, I press toward the mark for the prize of the high calling of God in Christ Jesus.” (Philippians 3:13-14)

The Bible tells believers to let go of the past—our mistakes, our failures, our sin. If we’re constantly dwelling on what’s behind us, we can’t move forward.

If you are saved, the devil can’t have your soul, so instead, he wants to weigh you down with guilt, regret, and shame. He wants your past to strangle you, stunt your faith, and kill your motivation, peace, and joy. He wants you to keep revisiting the same mistakes over and over again until they consume you.

But guess what?

Romans 6 tells us that if we are in Christ, our old self has been crucified with Him. The old man is dead. You don’t live there anymore. Stop going back to visit his grave.

This weekend, I heard a song that says:

I wasn’t made to be tending a grave

I was called by name

Born and raised back to life again

I was made for more

So why would I make a bed in my shame

When a fountain of grace is running my way

I know I am Yours

And I was made for more

Are you grave-tending?

Are you stuck in guilt, revisiting past mistakes, allowing them to choke out your growth? 2 Corinthians 5:17 reminds us:

“If any man be in Christ, he is a new creature: old things are passed away; behold, all things are become new.”

How can you look forward to what God has for you if you’re constantly looking backward? How can you fully receive His goodness if you’re still holding onto guilt that He already died for?

Just like my basketball coach said: “We’ve got a new game to win.”

In life, we can’t afford to stop and dwell on the past. There’s too much ahead. There’s work to do, people to reach, victories to claim. If you’re a saved child of God, your past mistakes do not define you anymore.

Forget what’s behind. Press forward.

You are a new creation. You have been made new. Now, live like it!

You’ve got a season to win.