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May 07, 2023 06:00am

The Joy of Canceling Debt

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I will never forget that day! My husband had finished college several years prior and we were struggling financially with two small children. We were paying down the one student loan we had taken out the last year of his college, but it was proving difficult. It seemed like it was always being paid late. There was dread and a pit in my stomach every time I saw the financial institution’s phone number pop up on my caller ID. This day was no different–they were calling and I didn’t want to answer the phone, although I was a bit confused because the payment was not due yet. Nevertheless, the same nausea came over me when I saw the number. I answered the phone, but the voice on the other end sounded different than usual. It was cheerier and seemed more caring. The woman on the other end of the line informed me that we had been chosen to receive loan forgiveness for the remainder of my husband’s student loan. It was as if I had forgotten what the word forgiveness meant at that moment, because my mind couldn’t wrap itself around her words. I kept searching for why they had chosen us and how I could be certain this was really going to happen. I can’t tell you the relief and gratitude I felt that day. It was as if a weight had been lifted. The sound of the lady’s voice and her kind words told me she was enjoying giving me this news as much as I was enjoying receiving it. She got tickled at how hard she was having to work to get me to believe this forgiveness of debt was real.

As I was thinking about this story, it made me wonder why we are so hesitant to cancel other’s debt and forgive. This was a great day for both my family and for the woman who called me with the news. Why would we not want to participate in an act that brings us and the person receiving the forgiveness such joy?

There are several reasons. Even though we don’t like to admit the reasons why, let’s be courageous today and look at some of the things hindering our desire to engage with the joys of canceling debt.

First of all, when we are holding onto the wrongs of others, it seems as if we have the upper hand in the relationship. It’s understandable. It gives us the mindset that we are owed something and superior to the other person. This power can sometimes serve as a sense of protection, a weapon readily available anytime we feel threatened. When we are afraid, we can take out our weapon to push the other person away and keep them at what we perceive is a safe distance. In reality, it just serves to create more distance and keeps us from having any of the joys of a close relationship with that person.

Another reason we resist the act of canceling debt is that it requires humility. To forgive another person of wrongdoing requires an admission and understanding of our own failures, coupled with a realization that we need forgiveness as much as the person who needs our forgiveness. In truth, when we are wounded by another person, rather than engage with a humble attitude we tend to act as if we don’t have any sins while falling headlong into the sin of pride, resentment, or backbiting.

The last reason for not wanting to cancel another’s debt is that we do not understand how it is our commitment to God. If we understand that God extended His mercy and grace to us when we were disobedient, and as Romans 11 says, that those gifts are irrevocable, it ought to invoke in us a visible gratitude.

Romans 12 says it this way, “I exhort you brothers and sisters, by the mercies of God, to present your bodies as a living sacrifice- holy and pleasing to God – which is your reasonable service.”

The progression of this chapter includes: not thinking too highly of ourselves, using our God-given abilities to minister grace to one another, love genuinely in word and deed, have compassion on one another, use what power we have to live at peace with others, do not avenge ourselves but give it into God’s hands. In summary: “do not be overcome with evil but overcome evil with good”.

As recipients of God’s mercy and grace we are obligated to extend that to others. God’s justice and righteousness allow me to relinquish any wrongdoing into His hands. God’s compassion to me allows me to extend that same compassion to others. When we do this, we can experience and also give the joys of canceling debt to others.